By Sean Myra

It's no secret that we live in a celebrity-obsessed society, especially now that it's so easy to get the latest gossip on them. Sometimes this leads to invasions of their privacy, but nonetheless we remain transfixed as if by a train wreck – unable to look away from the horror and drama of their most recent meltdowns. The creators of Male Celebrities have long been cataloguing celebrity indiscretions and have amassed a vast library of the public and private moments that most stars would prefer to forget, indexing them on their expansive site for all to enjoy. Whether you want to sleep with them or to see how your manhood measures up to the latest action hero, celebrities have become a part of our popular consciousness. As an example, how many times have you described a goodlooking guy by comparing him to one or more celebrities? In many ways, celebrities have become a measuring stick of our shared ideals.
   
I was curious to find out if Male Celebrities could really deliver the things they promised, so I got a membership and began sniffing around. Purchasing a membership to the Male Celebrities site also grants access to the content from the Female Celebrities site (and vice versa), which is a great added value. However, those who don't want to see any boobage can configure their search results accordingly. You can browse by letter, which brings up hundreds of names and makes for a fun way to discover new things. In some ways, the site reminded me of being at the Louvre in Paris. It would take a very long time to view everything if you tried to click on every name and image. One thing that impressed me was the fact that they had gone as far as taking very clear screenshots from TV shows and movies. I can barely coordinate my eyes and index finger to hit pause on the remote for a money shot, so I felt grateful that someone with a steadier finger had done so much detailed research.
   
As many of us continue to get older, the new stars seem to get younger and younger. Miley Cyrus or Selena Gomez, anyone? But don't worry. Even if you have no interest in seeing the current “it” boys like Zac Efron or Chace Crawford naked, you won't be left out in the cold. (Speaking of those two – has anyone been able to discern any noticable differences between them? But I digress.) Those who prefer a man with a little hair on his chest, and with the wisdom that comes with age, will be happy to know that many older celebrities are also featured, including Jack Nicholson and Harrison Ford. (Admit it – you had a major hard-on for Hans Solo. We all did!) You can also find older stars like Paul Newman – before the whole salad dressing thing, dude was super hot – who were burning up the screen long before any of us had even become a sparkle in our parents' eyes.
   
One thing I wasn't expecting to see were celebrities having sex on camera. I had heard that rapper Ray J. and reality vixen Kim Kardashian had filmed themselves going all the way and that the tape had somehow gone public, as these things are wont to do. But no one had prepared me for the fact that it was closer to a Michael Lucas film than the typical soft-core sex-tape. Seriously – it was hotter than a lot of the gay porn I've seen. Who knew that Kim swallowed?! Also on offer is a clip of Lindsay Lohan smoking something other than a cigarette (perhaps proof that her intermittent lesbian hi-jinx are just for publicity.) If you haven't seen the tape of Tommy Lee abusing Pam Anderson's junk, you should also check out that infamous sex tape. In fact, if a sex tape exists, then you'll probably find it here.
   
The main event, though, is the hundreds of pictures available for each actor. You can search the whole library at once, but if you really want to get down to business you can also narrow your search to return only non-nude or semi-nude/nude shots. Those who couldn't care less about actors might be interested to learn that they also cover singers, as well as sports stars and famous models. I saw several images of the 20-year-old dude Miley Cyrus is supposedly dating, sporting only tight yellow briefs. All I can say is that my jaded eyes were pleasantly surprised. I also came across some hot pics of Shia LaBeouf, Jake Gyllenhaal, and the ever-delicious Brad Pitt in all his stunning, naked glory. They also offer plenty of links to hardcore porn as a free bonus, so you'll never leave the site unsatisfied!
   
Contact Sean Myra at: freelance@cybersocket.com

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